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I want to ask you in what A Course in Miracles means by Holy Relationship. In one part of the book it covers "entering the ark" together, and it almost sounds like you will need an added specific person to be able to awaken. Therefore, I believe I approach each new person with the expectation that maybe THIS could possibly be the relationship that reflects enlightenment to me, and I to them! Am I taking this too literally? Or do you actually need to have another to help you awaken?
I appreciate your own time so much and thank you for your help to me and others. I thank you and I thank God for you. Namaste.
David Hoffmeister: Thanks for your openness and your willingness to look deeply at what's underneath these topics and issues. A Course in Miracles teaches that the split mind contains both the problem (the ego) and the Solution (the Holy Spirit). When they are brought together, only One remains.
Your body and the world are always the focus of ego's perspective, for this seeks to create real problems and struggles in the world and to prevent the inner Healing Correction of the Holy Spirit. The ego's distorted world is the merchandise of identity confusion, an outpicturing of the belief it is possible to create an identity which God did not create. The ego is this identity problem and it absolutely was Answered or forgiven by the Holy Spirit the instant it appeared to arise. This 1 problem could possibly be described as an authority problem or even a confusion in who is the author of Reality. Your head that believes in the reality of the time-space cosmos has a get a handle on issue, for this believes that it can make itself. This ego mind also thinks it is in competition with God, although this really is pushed out of conscious awareness. This unconscious ego thought system is exposed in the A Course in Miracles Workbook lessons, and Lesson 13 contains a great example of this unveiling:
"A meaningless world engenders fear because I believe I am in competition with God."
That is the start of training the mind to forgive, for the focus is cut back to the mind, back once again to thinking, and recinded from the human body and the world. Anorexia, weight issues, body image issues, and interpersonal relationship issues are examples of projection, of seeing the problem where it is not: in the world. Your head cannot tolerate the belief in a war with God, which means this belief is pushed out of awareness. The deep-seated control issue such a belief entails is then projected to the human body and the world. Weight control, like any attempt to manage the script or the human body, is an endeavor to manage the past. The Holy Spirit teaches that days gone by can only be forgiven or released or viewed as false—not fixed or controlled or changed.
The exact same ego dynamic is underneath interpersonal relationship struggles of power and control, of wanting to fix or change a person or even a self-image. Personal relationships might appear to sail happily along for awhile, the make-believe self-concept IS the non-public perspective and thus is definitely on shaky ground. Decisions are continuous. The Holy Spirit is just a decision. The ego is just a decision. Atonement is your choice that ends all decisions, an acceptance of the changelessness of Mind. acim The ego is your choice to think that the mind could be separate from God. Once the mind believed that it had separated and built this time-space world, this time-space world of bodies became its substitute identity, since it believed it'd discarded the Kingdom of Heaven. The entire world was created up instead identity. The sleeping mind is split on your choice of identity. The Holy Spirit says, "This world isn't Identity. This world can be an illusion." And thus the Holy Spirit reminds the mind constantly, "This world isn't your Home. This world isn't your Identity. This world isn't real." While the mind is split it is hearing another voice (the ego) that's saying: "You've done it. You've separated from God. You'd better make the very best of it and find something of the world to recognize with. You can never return back for God will punish you."
Thought-form associations seem becoming a substitute identity. The ego mind seems to be identified with the human body, with family, with environments that seem to surround it (i.e., I'm an American, Japanese, I'm male, I'm female, I'm from a rich family, from an undesirable family, I'm Catholic, Jewish, Protestant, etc.) All of these are thought-form associations. And these seeming other persons and places surrounding the little personal self are part of this construction. Your head is very shaky relating to this small identity, this small self, this little me. So the little me is shaky, and it looks like other persons give the little me reality and importance (i.e., you're my son, my daughter, you're my boss, you're a loving father, etc.) and all the different issues that these images appear to be telling this little me appear to be really important. Praise thus seems very important (i.e., you are a person and you're a good one!).
Praise and acceptance from others SEEM to stabilize this very shaky thing (i.e., you're a good lover, you're a good provider, you're great with the kids, you have a fine intellect, you have such a heart, you help serve so many other folks, you're a good team-player, on and on). This part of the self-concept says that you are a person and you have all of these positive attributes that really cause you to an invaluable and worthy person, which make you be noticeable above the crowd. You're not just anyone—you're somebody special. The flip side is criticism, which directly reflects the shaky sense of self. Criticism could be: you're not as great as you believe you are, you're not such a good team player, such a good provider, so good in bed—all the stuff which can be taken as insults to the non-public self-concept). That's the flip side of the strokes. To this ego self-concept that believes both sides (the positive and negative) of thinking are real, the Holy Spirit is perceived as a good threat, for the Holy Spirit leads to the knowledge of forgiveness or the realization that none of the tiny images perceived as separate have any reality.
When the criticism seems ahead, the ego attempts a substitution. It thinks, "I don't need this. I'll go elsewhere and start other relationships with people who can appreciate my talents and skills and abilities, appreciate my personhood. I will avoid those negative influences in the world and those negative people. I'll find someone else or join an organization where people are like-minded and neglect the remaining world. These new people should me and stroke me and praise me." The attempt at substitution is an endeavor to keep a feeling of specialness, a feeling of separation, a feeling of individuality (a private mind with private thoughts). Those attempts are special love relationships. They appear to strengthen worth and value and to validate personhood. And they provide a false witness for clinging to the ego as identity. To the ego, past associations serve to give personhood some sense of stability and consistency and value. Yet, the Holy Spirit shows that past associations offer nothing of value, for these were made by the ego to deny the reality of God's Love.
Holy relationship emphasizes and reflects Content (right-minded thinking) and posseses an awareness of the meaninglessness of form. While the ego's believed relationships will appear to be specific, yet every one will present an opportunity to release the belief in specifics. Divine Mind is Abstract and Universal. Forgiveness could be the bridge to the remembrance of Christ and God, Divine Abstraction. Thus the Holy Spirit teaches in A Course in Miracles:
"When you meet anyone, remember it is just a holy encounter. As you see him you might find yourself. As you treat him you'll treat yourself. As you think of him you'll think of yourself. Always remember this, for in him you will see yourself or lose yourself. Whenever two Sons of God meet, they are given another chance at salvation. Don't leave anyone without giving salvation to him and receiving it yourself. For I am always there with you, in remembrance of you.
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