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In the world of New York divorce law, particularly with alimony, some perceived "faux pas" might not be as detrimental as they appear.Here are some examples that can turn out to be acceptable, or even beneficial, depending on the context:
1. Asking for Temporary Alimony Right Away
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Some people fear it might appear overly aggressive or opportunistic.
Why it’s okay: Temporary alimony ensures financial stability during the divorce process and is common practice.Courts recognize its necessity for the lowerearning spouse.
2. Negotiating for a Higher Alimony Amount
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: It might seem greedy or unrealistic.
Why it’s okay: Starting negotiations high allows room for compromise and ensures your needs are met, especially if you’re uncertain about future financial stability.
3. Highlighting NonMonetary Contributions
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Some fear these arguments won’t carry weight in court.
Why it’s okay: Nonmonetary contributions, like raising children or managing the household, are valid factors in determining alimony under New York Divorce Law Alimony.
4. Opting for a LumpSum Payment
Why it’s okay: Lumpsum payments can provide immediate financial security and eliminate the need for ongoing contact with the exspouse.
5. Requesting Modifications PostJudgment
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Some perceive it as going back on the original agreement.
Why it’s okay: Life circumstances change, and New York law allows for modifications if there’s a significant change in finances or needs.
6. Agreeing to Mediated Alimony Terms
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Some believe mediation leads to less favorable outcomes compared to court rulings.
Why it’s okay: Mediation often leads to faster, less expensive, and mutually agreeable resolutions without the adversarial nature of litigation.
7. Turning Down Alimony
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: People might assume you’re forfeiting your rights or making a poor financial decision.
Why it’s okay: If you have sufficient independent resources, declining alimony can simplify the divorce and avoid future entanglements.
8. Suggesting a TimeLimited Alimony Agreement
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: It might look like underestimating the financial impact of the divorce.
Why it’s okay: Timelimited agreements can encourage selfsufficiency and are often tailored to match a specific need, like completing education or job training.
9. Using Alimony for Personal Growth
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Critics might argue alimony should only cover immediate necessities.
Why it’s okay: Investing in education, training, or starting a business aligns with the goal of alimony: helping the recipient become financially independent.
10. Disagreeing with the ExSpouse’s Alimony Proposal
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: It might appear combative or ungrateful.
Why it’s okay: Ensuring the terms are fair and realistic is essential, and disagreement is part of the negotiation process.
11. Factoring in the ExSpouse’s New Partner
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Bringing up an exspouse’s relationship can seem intrusive or irrelevant.
Why it’s okay: If cohabitation significantly reduces your ex’s financial needs, it’s a valid argument for modifying alimony.
12. Accepting a Lower Alimony Amount for Other Benefits
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Some might think you’re settling for less than you deserve.
Why it’s okay: Trading lower alimony for other favorable terms, like property division or custody arrangements, can lead to a more balanced overall settlement.
13. Ending Alimony Discussions Quickly
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: It might seem like rushing through critical negotiations.
Why it’s okay: If the proposed terms meet your needs and goals, there’s no harm in concluding negotiations efficiently.
14. Relying on Legal Advice Over Emotional Opinions
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: Friends or family might view it as impersonal or overly pragmatic.
Why it’s okay: New York Divorce Law Firmare legal matters, and basing decisions on professional advice often leads to better outcomes.
15. Revisiting the Agreement After Divorce
Why it’s seen as a faux pas: People might believe the matter is settled and shouldn’t be reopened.
Why it’s okay: If circumstances like job loss, illness, or remarriage arise, revisiting the agreement is legally permissible and often necessary.
By reframing these socalled "faux pas" as reasonable and sometimes strategic decisions, individuals involved in alimony negotiations can make confident choices that align with their goals and needs.
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